June 26, 2013

How many same-sex marriages in the U.S.? At least 71,165, probably more

Today, the Supreme Court struck down the Defense of Marriage Act’s key section, which prohibited federal recognition of same-sex marriages and denied same-sex couples who were married under state law a panoply of federal benefits — from favorable tax treatment to the ability to be buried together in veterans’ cemeteries — that are available to opposite-sex married couples.

Which got us wondering: How many same-sex marriages have there been in the United States since 2004, when Massachusetts became the first state to legalize them? Our best estimate: At least 71,165, but almost certainly more.

Gathering reliable figures on same-sex marriages turns out to be a lot trickier than one might think — largely because, as Justice Kennedy wrote in his DOMA opinion, “[b]y history and tradition the definition and regulation of marriage…has been treated as being within the authority and realm of the separate States.”

Among other things, that means each state can decide how it collects and publishes marriage statistics. We were able to obtain figures from eight of the nine states that currently permit same-sex marriage. Maryland, where same-sex marriage became legal as of Jan. 1, has yet to compile figures on how many there have been; data from the District of Columbia, which legalized same-sex marriage effective March 2010, weren’t available. (Three more states — Delaware, Minnesota and Rhode Island — will begin issuing same-sex marriage licenses later this summer.)

Massachusetts, which has authorized same-sex marriages the longest, also has had the most: 22,406 through 2012. New York had at least 12,285 same-sex marriages in 2011 and 2012; Connecticut witnessed 5,759 from 2009 through 2011. Nearly 2,500 same-sex couples were married in Washington state between Dec. 6, 2012 and March 31 of this year. Maine, where same-sex marriages became legal on Dec. 29, had 428 through last week.

California presents a special case. Same-sex marriages there were performed from June 2008, when the state Supreme Court legalized them, until voters passed Proposition 8 that November, which inserted a ban in the state constitution. In the absence of any official state figures, we relied on an estimate by the UCLA School of Law’s Williams Institute that 18,000 same-sex marriages took place in California during the four-and-a-half months they were legal; the state still recognizes those marriages. (The Supreme Court today also declined to rule on an appeal of a lower-court ruling invalidating Proposition 8, essentially clearing the way for same-sex marriages to resume in that state.)

But there almost certainly have been more U.S. same-sex marriages than the official records show, for several reasons.

First, there are significant lags in most of the states’ data. Many states have yet to compile marriage statistics for 2012, and only a few have counts for any part of 2013. New York City, which keeps marriage records separately from the rest of New York state, counted 7,184 same-sex marriages in the year after they were legalized in July 2011, but the city hasn’t released any figures since.

Also, some states no longer require couples applying for marriage licenses to designate their genders (asking for “Party A” and “Party B,” for instance, instead of “bride” and “groom”). In 2012, for instance, New York state’s preliminary marriage count (excluding New York City) was 50,899 opposite-sex couples, 2,865 same-sex couples, and 7,950 couples where the gender of at least one spouse was unknown. At least some of those unknown-gender couples likely are same-sex.

Some states, such as New Hampshire, that allowed same-sex couples to form civil unions automatically converted them into marriages after the law was changed. And none of the states include same-sex couples who were married overseas (in one of the 16 countries that permits such marriages in all or part of their territory), even though their marriages are recognized under state law.

In a brief filed earlier this year in the Supreme Court case challenging the federal Defense of Marriage Act, Williams Institute scholar Gary Gates used Census data to estimate that 114,100 same-sex couples in the United States are legally married, though that figure would include couples married overseas.

The growing availability of marriage to more U.S. same-sex couples has economic, as well as social and demographic, impacts. For instance, the Williams Institute estimated that within  three years after Washington state legalized same-sex marriage in late 2012, some 9,500 in-state same-sex couples would get married, spending an aggregate $88 million (in wedding arrangements and tourism expenditures by their guests) to do so.

Such analyses, though, rely on projections of how many same-sex couples will want to marry. In the Pew Research Center’s recent survey of LGBT Americans, similar percentages of unmarried gay men and lesbians (56% and 58%, respectively) said they would like to get married someday; 4% of gay men and 6% of lesbians said they were currently legally married (the report did not attempt to estimate the total LGBT population).

But the marriage figures to date suggest a somewhat different story: Lesbian couples accounted for over three-fifths of the more than 50,000 same-sex marriages that were identified by gender. In fact, female-female marriages outnumbered male-male marriages in every reporting jurisdiction except New York City.

Topics: Supreme Court, Gay Marriage and Homosexuality

  1. Photo of Drew DeSilver

    is a senior writer at Pew Research Center.


  1. Emily2 years ago

    I believe this is all completely ridiculous. there should be no such thing as a “straight” and “gay” marriage, its just marriage, this should not have even been a problem to begin with. everyone deserves equal rights no matter if they’re gay, straight, black, white, male, female, or believe in any religion. why are people labeled as “gays” and why aren’t anyone else labeled as “straights”. sexuality is just an illusion love whoever the hell you want it doesn’t matter, and don’t let any ones opinion stop you because at the end of it all the only persons opinion and feelings that matter are your own, worry about yourself not others. people shouldn’t be labeled like this, we’re not food or a brand of clothes we’re human beings with feelings. and since when does someone else getting married or divorced affect anyone else directly, it none of your business who I love or don’t love and its none of mine who you love or don’t love. liking the same sex is just as natural as loving the opposite sex. love is love.

    1. Mr T2 years ago

      what next polygamy. bestiality, marriage which involves consensual incest…. Where do you draw the line, when is it morally wrong

    2. Anonymous1 year ago

      maybe you don’t want to report it to avoid the question of why did we bother in the first place?

  2. Elisabeth2 years ago

    Now that same sex marriage is legal, these stats need to be updated.

  3. Hotbite2 years ago

    Now that homosexual marriage has been made legal in all states, it will be interesting to see the percentage of homosexual men that actually get married. Research shows that homosexual men average over 100 sex partners in their lifetime. That’s the average. If that’s how the average homosexual man lives, I’m thinking he doesn’t want to get married. My prediction….the rate of homosexual men who actually get married will be less than 20% and the divorce rate among homosexual men who actually do get married will be about 80%.

  4. RealGoodAnswer2 years ago

    Adam And Eve, the way it should be.

    1. Alex2 years ago

      Well, I guess I’ll go tell my friends Lauren and Jeff that they need to amend their wedding invitations…

  5. Prof.J.Jinadasa3 years ago

    The US has the greatest freedom for people and therefor, same sex marriage is generally recognized by majority. This freedom is biologically detrimental for mankind.Homo sapiens came to exists due to evolution as a result of natural selection. Due to same sex marriages variability is reduced. Thus, evolution though a slow process would be retarded. On the other hand if all undergo same sex marriage, then at some point, the US would be devoid of people. All along the biological system, fertilization or union of male sex cells with female sex cells kept the populations to continue. Same sex marriage would undoubtedly stop this biological phenomena. Therefore, while supporting the US freedom to people, same sex marriage must not be allowed by law and people must be discouraged in doing so by educating biology. Jinadasa,PhD.Massachusetts.

  6. The Truth3 years ago

    Gay marriage should be legal.

  7. The Truth3 years ago

    Gay marriages should be illegal.

  8. felicity helt3 years ago

    Okay look, same-sex marriage should be legal in every country, state, it should just be legal and I only say that because, I my self am very much for same-sex marriage! why you ask? because I am bisexual, so I believe in same-sex marriage. and if no one likes it I guess they shouldn’t try to discuss the topic then!! right??? well that’s my very own opinion, what’s yours? every body is entitled to an opinion sometime or another why not be now? Oh and one more thing, If your parents or friends can not accept you for you then they either wasn’t your friends in the first place, and or if they are your parents they are just protecting their kids from growing up and or are religious and think everything should be based on the bible.. well it shouldn’t. Yes I believe in the bible, but I don’t believe that it should be used against someone that is probably the worst thing you could do!!!!! Anyway this is my opinion what shall be yours/

    1. Imran2 years ago

      I agree with you

  9. Collin3 years ago

    As I thought: a tiny percentage actually “do it”. Now the question is: how many have been divorced and remarried in these 9 years? If it’s high then I would say that marriage is meaningless to the LGBT community. If it’s low, then perhaps it is something of use to them, but the tiny percentage speaks volumes about the “tempest in a teapot” this if for them. “I want! I want! I want!….Oh, it’s like that? I don’t want it.”

    1. Ross Thureau3 years ago

      I’m sure that similar arguments were made when interracial marriage was on the docket. The fact is that we don’t open the doors to marriage just because a large percentage of people are in need of it. We do these things because our rights are innumerable and unalienable. Our founding father’s didn’t write the Bill of Rights to specify every right we had, they wrote it to keep the government and other people from intruding on the few rights they were most concerned about.

      If it was just this tiny little sliver – then why did the other side fight so hard to keep it from happening, acting as though it is the end of the world for this tiny little percentage to be able to marry? See the argument can be used in the opposite direction too.

      People seem to think that we live in a direct democracy where the majority rules. We don’t. We live in a representative democracy – a republic, where the voice of the masses is balanced by the right of the individual. If direct democracy had been the case the civil rights movement would have taken decades longer to take root and likely only after every other country in the world had abolished the practices we held so tightly. The majority would have stuck to their guns. But instead we go back to those unalienable rights – the one that every man and woman of this country is afforded for no other reason that the fact that they were born (here, or went through the long and expensive process to gain citizenship).

      For example if I said that interracial marriages, specifically black men marrying white women are 200% more likely than single race couples to end in divorce, does that mean we should disallow black men from marrying white women? Obviously the institution is not for them right? But that would be an idiotic thing to say and bigoted to boot.

      You’ll find that some gay people are still in the closet. Only a little less than 3% self identify in polling. And those out of the closet may not be in stable relationships for a variety of issues related to social pressures. Those that are both out of the close and in stable relationships my want to get married. They may also want to forego marriage because they don’t want to invest in something the state may take away or that will be invalid should they need to move for work. Many may just opt for a private – spiritual ceremony and choose to use legal contracts instead. This will all keep the number artificially low for probably a generation at least. Once legalized in every state, the number will rise, but still always be on the lower end due to the fact that homosexuality is going to exhibit in under 20% of the population (based on studies of attraction not self-polling.)

      So it doesn’t matter how many gay people get married or divorced, how much they value the institution versus hetero couples, etc., those are all just red herrings. Gay marriages may have more stressors that induce divorce (external pressures like job or housing discrimination, emotional scars from years of harassment, undealt with abuse, childlessness/infertility/adoption issues, etc.) that parallel and in some cases add on to what hetero couples deal with.

      This doesn’t mean that we close the doors to them because they’re unsuitable. It means we open the doors and work on our society being a more suitable and nurturing environment for marriage as a whole. That we take their relationships just as seriously as our own and in doing so encourage them to work through their problems like we would any of our friends/family. Eventually children may be involved in that family dynamic and we want to promote happy healthy and whole homes for those children – in the interest of our society.

      1. ThinkAboutIt2 years ago

        Examine your post in light of these statistics…………

        Total # of married couples in US…….59 million
        Total # of same-sex married in US……..71 thousand

        What percentage of 59 (almost 60) million is 71 thousand?

        Is it wise to redefine words and destabilize time-honored traditions for this miniscule number of people?

    2. James2 years ago

      I was not aware that anyone’s marriage or divorce was your business, but whatever. I am pretty sure that statistically, straight marriages break down far more often than gay ones, although that will change when the next generations who didn’t have to fight so hard for it perhaps don’t hold it as such a gift. I can tell you’re looking for smug, self-righteous reasons for why it’s long but really, sweep your own porch.

  10. Kelly Marie3 years ago

    All this fuss and less than 1 percent of ALL marriages are gay??

    1. Jacob Israel3 years ago

      “Less than 1%”?

      It’s less than 0.1% indicating that the MYRBS study showing that only 0.37% identify as gay IS correct.

    2. Jacob Israel3 years ago

      To be precise, gay marriages are now a whopping 0.09% of all marriages.

      Why did we overhaul society for THIS?

      1. James2 years ago

        A far better question is why did it take so long, and why did you put up such an horrific fight? The way you all were acting, you’d think everyone was about to turn gay.

  11. destiny3 years ago

    i am 14 and i totally support gay and lesbians even though i am not one my self. i think they are normally and really funny people who just want egual rights. this artical help a lot and it gave me alot of information to use on my school project over gave marriage. thanks tfor the info.

  12. Taysia3 years ago

    The info was great quality. I am all for the gay couples and lesbian couples. I have been researching this topic for a very long period of time. This helped tremendously in my research. Thank you very much for writing this. Gays cannot help who they fall in love with and why they do fall in love with them. Below the for gays team posted. Now i do not have a facebook but i support them. Gays should be accepted for who they are not what they are. I believe in this and i will get my research done in a few short months or weeks and i will fight for gays.


    1. Mr T2 years ago


      If Gays and Lesbian can help who they fall in love with love then one could argue that it is then they are born this way (biological not environment) yet since mans existence their have been noon definitive proof from the scientific community stating or showing otherwise.

  13. For Gays Team4 years ago

    For Gays, has a Facebook page, We are hear as support to out coming gays. We try to help people know that they are just like everyone else.

    For Gays was started by 4 friends that are gay them self, I am one of them. We started the For Gays Facebook page to try to help people understand that we can not help who we are, and that sometimes we can not help that we a different then most people in this world…

    When we first started F.G we would get messages like, how do you tell your family that you are something that they have told you so many times that is wrong. Our answer is always the same. They are family and that family is the one group of people that should love you for who you are no matter what you chose to do with your life, or chose too sleep next to when you go to bed.

    We have asked them the same question, if you have a chose to get married would you… Just about all of them said yes they would.

    We try to answer every message, every email, It may not be in the same day but we do try to answer it in the best way we know how.

    You can feel free to come and find us on Facebook, Sipply type in For Gays, or email use at forgays@icloud.com

    Thank you,

    For Gays team

  14. angel hayes4 years ago

    i feel that same sex marriage has the same equality as an opposite sex marriage because love knows no gender.it doesn’t matter if you like the same sex or opposite sex because you are human you have the right to be treated like one like an equal and not like a monster or like you are taken over by a demon because you like the same sex.same sex marriage is as much of a right as an opposite marriage.

    1. duh…..2 years ago

      Gay is lust not love.Stop fooling yourself. Common sense eludes you.

  15. Jill Barker4 years ago

    Have you attempted to update this, or will you do so soon? Thanks for the report.

  16. Timothy Dobbins4 years ago

    I would like to know how Gays and Lesbians feel about being associated with bi-sexuals and trans-sexuals, which would seem to be an advantage in membership numbers only. To whom do B’s and T’s want to be wedded? What percentage of GLBT’s are B’s and T’s? Does the GLBT Alliance approve or disapprove of any other marriage arrangements? Is it deemed to be inappropriate or homophobic to ask these questions?

  17. Alan Baker4 years ago

    It is my understanding that there are already suites filed challenging Section 2. Do you know of that is so?

  18. Pete4 years ago

    Interesting numbers on the “If you could, would you like to get married some day”. Do you have similar statistics for heterosexuals?

    1. Drew DeSilver4 years ago

      Sort of. It’s a bit of apples and oranges, or oranges and tangerines, since heterosexuals can get married already. A survey from 2010
      asked all adults (not just heterosexuals) if they wanted to get married; of those who’d never been married, 61% said yes, 12% said no, and the rest weren’t sure.

  19. Mark4 years ago

    My understanding is that all the act was not stricken. Just that part that deprived the s/s couples of federal benefits.

    1. Drew DeSilver4 years ago

      Quite right, Mark — section 3, generally recognized as the core of DOMA, defined marriage for all purposes of federal law as being between one man and one woman only; that’s the provision the Court struck down. Section 2, which allows states to refuse to recognize same-sex marriages performed under the laws of other states, wasn’t at issue in the Windsor case and so the Court didn’t address it. We’ll update the post accordingly.